So, if you remember, I ended part 2 of Growing up Sandy with such a dysfunctional view of myself and a totally skewed idea of what I was supposed to be in order to fit into the worlds expectations of me. I thought and believed, now that I was thin….that all was good in disillusionville (yes, I made that word up).
Anyway, my unintentional goal became, let’s make up for lost dating/boy time. Let’s just say my judgement was off, my self respect was no longer a consideration. I’ll leave out most of the details except for a few key points.
My part time job at the local Toys R Us for Christmas 1977 (I think) led me to a cute manager. We went out on a date. I was 18 and he was quite ashamed to tell me he was separated from his wife and 30. On my date with him, I was date raped. I spent years blaming myself and even more ashamed.
After two years of college, a new boyfriend and a disastrous move to upstate New York, I ended up where I always wanted to be but where my mom would never let me go. I enrolled in Ultissima Beauty School in Hicksville, LI and I loved it. However, being a part of the salon/beauty industry led to a bit of a wild lifestyle. Full blown partying became a daily event once I got my first job in a high-end salon. I didn’t know the word no. It seems I never knew the word no. If I said no to you, you might not like me. I couldn’t take the chance. But I couldn’t say no anyway….I clearly had an addictive personality. I was the one who needed more of anything being passed around than anyone else. I